Sudra Returns

It has been many years since Santosha last used my voice to express herself! Too long! She is an elder now, looking her age and creaking in all the right places. Fortunately, I don't age, as I am the voice of her awareness. I'm just as innocent as I have always been. Innocent and irreverent. How wonderful that awareness doesn't age, which leads to the question: does it process, grow, and expand into an unfathomable infinite depth? I don't know how to answer that. I know for sure that awareness is aware—aware of what? Aware of whom? I guess I'm back to (already!) perceiver is not an identity; it is a function. The function of being, of being aware. Our greatest luxury, and the greatest game of being alive. One thing I know is my innocence does not have process or growth or depth—it just is. I've always been an innocent, always will be. I could say that that is my greatest revelation, but I am way too innocent for great revelations. I am undiluted, purity-bliss of Being, radiating and soaking up the rays of its already happy happiness. Could happiness be that great? Is happiness way too much for this world? Is happiness a choice? Can you choose to be happy? Does anyone have any idea what happiness is? I recommend getting rid of any ideas you might have. They are only going to get in the way of already being happy!

Ever notice that your ideas about being happy are about some future event (crossed fingers!) or some past event (rewritten, I'm sure, to appear happy)? They are not about now. The now! When is that? And how do we get to it? Be here now. Can you be anywhere but the here and now? Can your thoughts really take you anywhere—to a much-preferred past event or a wonderfully imagined, fulfilling future moment? Can our thoughts land us someplace else than where we are right now? Do they really have that much power over us? Okay, I'm thinking of the hike I took last week, walking through the Sequoia Forest, lovely day. Okay, I'm thinking about hiking to the falls in King's Canyon tomorrow. No matter, past adventure or future adventure, it doesn't move me out of this now of sitting on my bed writing this. It seems we can't get out of this present moment by thinking about the past or future. We're stuck in the only time there is, the present, and for me this present is the presence of timelessness, my true nature, and yours, isn't it? Don't worry about the future; it's only the presence of the present. Don't worry about the past, not because it's dead and gone and already happened, but because it is (was!) only the presence of the present too! Which leads to the question: does anything ever happen? Yah! A lot happens (so it seems!) but it only happens in the eternal present. The best of times! The eternal present—that's where the eternal presence hangs out and creates everything while appearing to do as little as possible! We are imagining all this, and we haven't even lifted a finger yet! What kind of power can create all this and not have to lift a finger to do it?

Do we, as ourselves, as individuals, have the power to create, to manifest, to change anything or everything? Sudra wanted to try an experiment. She summoned up her great unknowing, "Great Unknowing, I would like the power to change everything," and she added, "for the better."

The Great Unknowing chuckled and thought, here we go, an innocent is requesting the power to change everything for the better. Her deep unknowing asked her, "You sure you want this?"

"Yes," she answered, "let's give it a try and see how it goes."

"Alright, all your siddhis, all your powers are open, ready to go, and available for your use. Let me know how it goes."

Sudra laughed and said to her deep unknowing, "It's on!"

On the first day of her experiment, she wondered what her powers were. She went for the obvious ones first. "Can I fly?" she wondered. She walked outside, looked into the cloudless sky, raised up her arms and said, "Rise!" She did! "This is fun," she thought, and rose to the top of the mountain that was in her backyard. "Land," she told herself, and her feet touched the top stone of the mountain peak. She could see the surrounding landscape: the rivers, the lake, the other mountains, and the houses nestled along the river. "What if I take a running start and jump off the mountain? Will I fly away?" She was a bit nervous about doing that, as she was not yet confident about her ability to fly. "Should I flap my arms like a bird?" She thought that seemed a bit silly. She also thought it was awkward and perhaps dangerous to take a flying leap. "I'll do it anyways," she laughed to herself. "I know I can rise and land; I'm sure I can fly as well." She jumped off the mountain and started to fall towards the ground. "Rise," she thought, and she did. "Go forward," and she did. She got the hang of it, and before she knew it, she was trying drops and loops and swirls. A couple of hawks noticed the strange flying and pushed off from their perch to investigate. They were astonished to see a woman flying and asked themselves, "What gives? How is this human woman flying with no wings? She isn't even flapping her arms!"

She heard their inquiry and flew closer and said, "It's one of my powers. What do you think?"

The hawks let out a big hawk squeal, which translated to, "It's unnatural for a human being to fly without wings."

"You think so?" Sudra asked.

The hawks circled her and expressed their disapproval. "It is our natural ability, our power to fly. Why do you have this power?"

"I'm doing an experiment. I wanted to experience the power to fly. I want to see how it can be of benefit."

The hawks scoffed and shook their heads. "We don't know how it will be of benefit for you and your kind, but the benefits for us are enormous. We search for food, water, a place to nest and roost, and it is also a source of enjoyment." They both spotted a snake and swooped down and the quickest hawk scooped it up with its talons, and the slower hawk chased after it, hoping to share the meal.

Sudra was getting tired and landed on a big rock that was exposed in the middle of the river. That was fun, and she thought of the possible places she could fly to where she would enjoy the vantage point. "I'll take my iPhone and take some shots; that will give another perspective to my photos." She enjoyed her flying ability and got a few special shots, some good aerial photos, but she wasn't sure how to use the power to benefit others. She grew bored with it and wondered, "What other powers do I have?"

The power to read other people's thoughts intrigued her, and she thought she would give it a try. If she knew what was on people's minds, what they were thinking about, she could find a way to help them or make them happy. She went to a busy restaurant and sat at a table, observing people. She ordered a pulled pork sandwich accompanied by coleslaw. While she waited for her food to come, she zeroed in on the mind of a twenty-something woman eating lunch with a man whom she guessed was her boyfriend or husband. What she found out was she was cheating on her boyfriend with the man she was with. She heard both of their thoughts and was surprised at what the woman was thinking about: "Why am I doing this? He's not even good in bed!"

Sudra heard the man's thoughts, "I'll probably be able to have sex with her after lunch."

"Wow," Sudra thought. She observed the woman some more and wondered why the woman was having this affair at all. She didn't seem to enjoy the man's company much, even without hearing her thoughts. Her body language spelled out, "Give me some space." Sudra decided to ask her why she was doing this—from woman to woman, mind to another mind. The woman heard Sudra ask her, "Why are you doing this?" The woman was shocked to hear another person's voice inside her head. "Am I hearing voices now?" she asked herself, "Am I going crazy?"

Sudra replied, "No, I'm talking to you telepathically. I am sitting at the table across from you."

The woman looked at Sudra, and Sudra confirmed to the woman, "Yes, I am speaking to you telepathically."

The woman became frightened and jumped up, grabbed her purse, and hurriedly exited the restaurant. That didn't go very well, thought Sudra. I still don't know why she was cheating on her boyfriend with someone she didn't really like. Sudra finished her pulled pork sandwich. I guess it's really none of my business. She wondered if she would enjoy anybody hearing her thoughts—anybody but Santosha, of course! She thought that sending and receiving other people's thoughts was best reserved for intimates who shared a very deep bond. She wondered if there were any cases in which hearing other people's thoughts could be of help. What are the benefits of being psychic, she wondered, besides making some kind of living by reading people's past or future? The experiment of reading people's thoughts under different situations met with some interesting scenarios. She also came to see and hear that most people weren't focused on their thoughts and were adrift in unresolved feelings that came from difficult events in their lives.

As Sudra was a free spirit, a true and authentic innocent, she couldn't understand the force of negative, conflicted feelings most people had bottled up inside. She grew bored of this power as well and didn't see it as having much use to benefit others. The more she heard of people's internal life, the more she realized that people were unaware of their true innocence. Oh, people always thought that they were innocent—that they did not contribute to whatever they were suffering, that they were victimized by other people's choices and bad intentions, that they were always right and at times always wrong. They never saw and sat in the state of natural innocence where all thoughts come and go and can be played with for pure enjoyment and pleasure. Again, perceiver is a function, not an identity.